Coup D'Etat!

Rank	Arashi Ranking Favorite (Top) to Least Favorite (Bottom)

There's been an upset in the rankings!  Ninomiya's recent smarminess has landed him down with the likes of Sakurai Sho.  (Whom I really don't hate.  Sho is totally...Sho-tastic.)  ::sigh::  I had tried so hard not to become a Matsumoto Jun fangirl, but it looks like that just wasn't in the cards.  Even if he's a whore for attention and probably a kinesthetic learner, the man can stand like nobody's business.

Ah well, Fandom is a volatile nation; I'm sure a new order will crop up within a month or so.

Who's the Lead Actor, Again?

Uta no Onii-san could have been titled The New Ohno Satoshi Vehicle.  It's an adorable show (I watched all eight episodes in two days), but wow do they want you to know that Ohno Satoshi is the star.  If you think an episode goes by without a reference to Arashi or the name Ohno, then you weren't paying attention.

"Why do we have to smile all the time?  It's not like we're idols or anything?"
"Hey, you look a lot like that guy...Ohno-san?"
And Sakurai Sho even cameos to promote his Yatterman.  (Sho seems to be making a hobby of guest-starring in friends' dramas.  Luckily he's got his own coming up and won't stay "the guest-spot guy" forever.)

Aside from Uta making the same joke every episode, the show has a lot of high points.  There are fights in animal costumes, kids mauling Ohno, and a supercool female lead.  Ohno's pretty good at playing the mildly grumpy Kenta, and we get to see a lot of classic "Ohno faces." 

 There's also Ohno getting kicked off a slide by some precocious Kindergarteners...

Two spastic running montages...

...and this guy.

This is just the first episode, people.  It's definitely a fun watch.

The Newest Caper

I love you, Lupin.

Quiz Update: Urgent!

I've been having too much fun taking random Arashi quizzes online.  You must be intrigued, so here are the overall results:

I will marry...

• 4 quizzes say Sakurai Sho
• 1.5 quizzes say Aiba Masaki
• 1.5 quizzes say Ninomiya Kazunari
• 1 quiz says Matsumoto Jun 
• 1 quiz says Ohno (Oh, no!) Satoshi

I am most similar to...

• 1 quiz says Sakurai Sho
• 1 quiz says Aiba Masaki
• 1 quiz says Ohno (Oh, no!) Satoshi

For the last time, Sakurai Sho, I will not marry you.  I just can't spend the rest of my life with a man who doesn't know if his underwear is on backwards.  Also, I already have a lovely husband.

The End of Uselessness?

Who would believe that Maruo on Tokyo Dogs is actually ending his streak of uselessness?  Not that he was totally useless before, but he certainly didn't do a lot aside from hitting on ladies and believing in people.

Well, he's still up to his old tricks--but now he's also busting gambling rings all by himself, going undercover, and even saving Detective So.  Oh my God, how did that happen?  (Granted, Det. So only needed saving for like 30 seconds and could totally have gotten himself out of it...but he didn't!)

As if all that weren't enough, Maruo's adamant belief in other people proved to be more than just another stereotypical element of Japanese storytelling.  It actually 1. helped solve a blackmailing case and 2. infected Det. So to the point that he was unnecessarily nice to two whole people.  Holy crap.

PS:  Guess who wore a suit for a good three-quarters of an episode?  The tables have turned, my friends. 

"My Girl"--Japan's Turn

I'd been putting off watching Aiba Masaki's new drama My Girl, mostly because I'm dumb.  Honestly, it looked kind of sappy, and that's not what I usually go for in a show.  Once again, I'm dumb.

Turns out the show is really well done.  Yes, there's some sap and (if you couldn't tell from the picture) cuteness levels are off the charts.  But the writing is fantastic, so none of that gets in the way.

The show presents a contemplative view on what it's like to deal with grief, to want to say something and not say it, to be overwhelmed, to be a parent.  I probably shouldn't say this about a manga-turned-drama, but it reminds me of Chekhov.  The hesitancy characters have in their relationships with each other, the words left unspoken, the constant presence of grief--all Chekhov.

Also, there are symbols.  They're used well.  You don't get hit over the head with corny lines like "The taste of these cookies is the taste of love."  (Sorry Hana Yori Dango, but you are painful like that.)  Frankly, you don't get hit over the head with anything but "Isn't this little girl adorable?" and "Doesn't Aiba Masaki look good in purple?"  It's refreshing that the show actually trusts its viewers to notice things on their own and is more interested in nuance than in repeating the last plot point.

Ow...

If I can tell it's bad Japanese, it's bad Japanese.  And step off the Arashi songs, EastWest Boys.  It takes a special kind of bad singing and sparkle power to pull those off, and you don't have it. 

On the other hand, you are 90s-tastic.  Is anyone else having New Kids/Power Rangers flashbacks?

Anyway, good luck with your latest boyband, Japan.  Please don't let me see their singles on the Oricon charts.

Winning Streak!

I don't know about compatability, but the guy can pull off Domyoji's ridiculous hair.  (And stand like a demon.)  Also, this quiz is from a real Japanese magazine and not some random fangirl.  Definitely...more reliable...I'm getting too into this. 

Arashi Kizuna Quiz: 

D. Matsumoto Jun
The truth is you're shy, and the one that would suit the shy you is Matsujun. Eventhough at a glance you seem cool, behind the surface you have passionate and heartful side, so probably you're kinda similar to him. Because he's someone who holds feelings importantly, it's also important for you to carefully make conversation. Because he's a soft-hearted person, if you take time to understand each other, you will be able to go along with him for a long time.

Evidence of Domyoji hair: 









Evidence of standing: (the middle one)

YES!

Take that, other quizzes!  Being Ohno (Oh, no!) Satoshi is the best.  And everyone knows he is NOT married to Sakurai Sho. 

Which Arashi member are you? Your Result:

You're SATOSHI (alias Oh-chan) OHNO!! You are the fearless (what? fearless? :p) leader of ARASHI, you are the epitome of entertainment, and not to mention you are the ideal son for all the wonderful, loving mothers around the world! You can sing, you can dance, you can make people smile, and your intense CAPOEIRA skills would make evildoers feel completely intimidated by YOU!

Stalker

QuizFarm, you are a liar.  Also, people who make Arashi quizzes:  Sakurai Sho is not that smart.  I know he went to college, but look at the things he puts on his head.  An academian he is not.

You Scored as Sakurai Sho

You're most compatible with Sho! You have a good head on your shoulders and have a broad outlook on life. Sho seems to prefer someone who is able to perceive the world and take it in stride - with him, you get a traveling companion. Results based on a 2006 translated interview about ideal marriages - therefore, you may want to take everything with a grain of salt. ;)

Sakurai Sho

80%

Ninomiya Kazunari

70%

Matsumoto Jun

68%

Ohno Satoshi

65%

Aiba Masaki

53%

New Ultimate Goal:  Take one of these quizzes and not get Sakurai Sho as a result.  There are five of them, for crying out loud!

NOOOO!

Quizzila, you are wrong!

Which Arashi Member Is Your True Lover? Your Result:

Congrats! Your true lover is Sakurai Sho! Unfortunetely, he is already married to ME, Norika (wahahaha)...
You are a type of girl that is very open and friendly. You can talk about anything: even SEX! You are very comfortable with who you are, and you have a very special and memorable personality. A strong woman that can take care of herself, AND her man!

I even retook the quiz to purposely weed Sho out.  (No offense, Sakurai Sho.  You're awesome, but not that awesome.  As always, your choice of headgear is questionable.)  

Tokyo Dogs: Now for Ladies

If Oguri Shun and Mizushima Hiro's law-enforcing shenanigans weren't enough to get us ladies to follow Tokyo Dogs, the plot has decided to incorporate some female-friendly elements of its own.  In short:  Love triangle.

Episode four saw "Nice to Every Girl" Maruo develop quite a crush on female lead Yuki.  (This also lead to some cute "I'm going to impress you now" moments.  Who knew Mizushima was so good at being embarrassed?)  Even if he won over the audience, Maruo failed to win the girl:  She likes stoic Detective So.  This would normally demonstrate a severe lack of judgement on her part, but Det. So is pretty awesome.  Det. So has yet to let us know where he stands on this issue, but we can all take a guess.

So!  Down to the speculation:  Who will she choose?  If past J-dramas are a good indicator (and we all know they are), Maruo is going down in a ball of second-male-lead flames.  Of all the dramas I've seen him in, Mizushima Hiro has only managed to get the girl once.  (He's even lost to a robot.  Come on!)  

Further plot developments should be interesting--and not just in a hilarious police love stand-off kind of way.  The writers are playing a little bit with first and second male lead stereotypes.  Usually it's the straight-laced, reliable guy (So) who ends up on the losing end of the love triangle.  Of course, Det. So will likely follow the first male lead pattern of being a jerk at first, but changing because of the female lead's love for him.  (He's already showing signs of softening:  Not shooting anyone in the knees and talking about his feelings only semi-grudgingly.)

What I'm really interested to see, though, is how this whole thing is going to affect Maruo and So's budding partnership.  Gene Wilder said that any buddy movie is really a romance between the two friends, and I think that applies to Tokyo Dogs as well.  Maruo and Yuki spend a good deal of episode five trying to figure out Det. So.  As Yuki starts to like Det. So more, so does Maruo.  Hopefully this will lead characters to reevaluate their opinions of each other and lead to some actually complicated relationship dynamics.  

Cross your fingers, people!  So far, the writing could go either way... 

This Is A Formula That Should Not Work

Plunging ever further into Japanese pop culture, I've taken a hiatus from J-dramas and moved on to the hard stuff--variety shows.  This genre is Japan at its goofiest, and even supercool boy bands like Arashi are not exempt from being made fools of.  In fact, the band has hosted over 300 episodes of weird variety show wonder.  

Prime example:  The picture above features Aiba Masaki enthusiastically executing his "A no Arashi" pose (with help from Assistant Sakurai Sho).  It's a segment where he gets really excited doing pointless scientific experiments.  For example, finding out what happens when you put binoculars on and try to run a hurdle race.  Also (true story), does wearing a suit of mirrors make you invisible?  (The answer, sadly, is no.)

Now, this should not make for good TV.  Yet, it does.  Shall we guess some reasons?

Reasons!  Which are true? 
1. Cut guys are cut guys, no matter how stupid they act.
2.  Wacky hijinks make pop stars (who are usually up on a pedestal) seem more accessible.  ("If this guy's willing to do such ridiculous things," thinks the fangirl, "it's not too much of a stretch to think he'd date me.")
3.  Wacky hijinks make pop stars easier to identify with.  ("These guys remind me of my friends and I.  I should buy their album.")
4.  Who doesn't want to see wacky hijinks?  No one, that's who.
Conclusion:  It's fun!

I have to confess that all four of those thoughts crossed through my mind as I watched episodes of ridiculous Arashi variety shows this weekend.  In fact, I plan on starting Aiba's new drama (My Girl) because of how semi-on-purpose funny he is during his experiments.  These shows are yet another cog in the wheel of highly effective Johnny and Associates marketing.  Perhaps N'Snyc, etc. would still be around if they'd followed suit?   

PS:  Utaban is probably the best of the bunch here.  Pop singing veteran Nakai torments his juniors.  Jeffer has the hook-up to even better moments at LiveJournal.

Mission: Failed

I had a theory that every Arashi song has the word omoide (memories) in it at least once.  Wordle was all too happy to disprove me.

OhMyGodOhMyGodOhMyGod!

You Are Beautiful's episode 15 (second to the last) was so awesome it broke my brain.  My husband, who kept hearing my screams and squeals as I watched it, asked what the heck happened.  I was incoherent.  I'm still incoherent.  (JavaBeans will do a much better job of talking about it.)  

Let's just say that all the loose ends from the whole rest of the series are tied up.  What are they going to do for the last episode?  How will they beat how great this episode was?  I can't wait!

Hilarity Ensues

Oh, Manager Ma Hoon Yi, what would I do without you?  Probably laugh a whole lot less while watching You Are Beautiful.  Not that the rest of the show isn't a riot, but Manager Ma (played by Kim In Kwon) reaches a level of hilarity all his own.  Let's just say that there's a reason he's front-and-center in this picture.

In need of crazy schemes?  Manager Ma is there.  What about a couple minutes of hijinks or shenanigans to fill in between dramatic scenes?  Manager Ma is there.  Someone needs to stick their nose into other people's business and then do a silly dance?  Manager Ma is there.  

I'm telling you, there's nothing this man can't do.  Kim In Kwon adds his own flavor to the character and makes him a real highlight of the show.  
...Of course, there's no way to beat Hwan Tae Kyung's "fightin' eyes."  Jang Geun Suk is a master at facial expressions.

I am so going to miss this show.    

Needs Adopted

I'm trying to talk my husband into adopting Arashi's Aiba Masaki.  Who cares if he's six months older than either one of us?  What with the apparent lack of common sense and frequent air-headed comments, he needs looking after.  If someone in the group is going to do something ridiculous and then screw it up...probably it's Aiba.  No offense, Aiba Masaki, these things just make you more adoptable. 

Also, we have a dog who would take great care of him.  Animals, children, and old people all love him:  Totally the "Yuki" of the group.

Happy TURKEY Day!

Ahaha!  It's a joke!

Talk about Conflicted

Macy's is selling Frango mint chocolates.  I know this is only because of their taking over Marshall Field's (which is a very bad thing). This is tied into some deep nostalgia for me; my friends and I would go to the downtown Chicago location and try to find the most cost-effective way to spend our big high-schooler budgets on the magic of Frango.  

After moving away, Frango mints were one of the things I missed most.  I always wanted to eat some again...but Macy's?  Why, God, must you sour the sweet, chocolatey, silky, meltingy...never mind.